love how google fills in search terms for you, today for example, i ran a query for "why do girls get t"
and google finished it w/ "ramp stamps."
I felt less weird knowing others had searched this before me.
so he came in me this morning and i was like WTF DUDE. i called him Daddy until he agreed to pay the full $40 for plan B. He wants to name our Patrick because it will be a st pattys day baby. absolutely NOT.
I can't believe you just thanked me for a blowjob on my Facebook wall...
We're smoking a joint the size of the average penis right now. I may not survive.
I have way too big of a thanksgiving food baby to enjoy any of my old high school booty calls
The guy who bit me so hard two nights ago that I had to put Neosporin on my nipple and the guy in my bed right now are two different people. Help
Me, him and the recently stolen carpet walked down the road and into the strip club. We had to check the carpet with our coats, it didn't mind missing out too much, later the door guy at Subway held carpet during late night sandwich selection.
This morning he fucked me while I was brushing my teeth. So I kept brushing as he thrusted. Then I brushed his teeth with my toothbrush while he was still in me. So hygienic.
If you don't turn up on horseback dressed like a highwayman I am not having sex with you today
And for the record I didn't even have sex last night. I threw up in his toilet and slept in his bed until noon
Let's drink lean at the 5 seconds of summer concert. Give the teens a glimpse into their future as dysfunctional adults holding desperately onto their youth. You in?
i just saw a man in the grocery, sitting on the floor, eating out of a galon sized tub of macaroni salad. We need to get on his level.
He told me he felt the only proper thing to do was fuck me to the top of the corporate ladder
I feel like a dancer trapped in the body of a math instructor. Love, Mom
Mid thrust, say hold on I need a pic for my friend.
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