Regardless thnx for trying to help out, I realize we are dealing w/ very stupid girls here
I am about to get in a knife fight over a corn dog.
mom came into my room and asked to borrow some condoms. We have gotten to the point where it's not awkward anymore.
I think I just fucked my first person born during the Clinton administration
We are hot boxing the gondola
I hate everything.
Just found a uh poem I wrote on ambien. It says to "cry your seamen filled tears" and "I hope you take a dagger to your vagina" and at the end it says "sincerely, God". What.the.fuck do they put in that pill?
I'm not judging you. Just know that you could be Queen of The World. Instead you're 5:28 p.m ponging. I hope you're at least winning
True enough. Do you ever think that these girls grandparents ghosts are watching you masterbate to their granddaughters and look at you in Shame?
I'm content with our "friends with accidental benefits" situation.
Kid got so high from the brownies he forgot his own name. Welcome to college.
i can't even hate his new girlfriend cuz she survived a fucking brain tumor. like that's just not fair.
she's a drunken disney princess. so basically me if i had a crown and no desire for independence.
We watched X-Files, ate pizza, and he played with my butt. It was a pretty standard Monday.
I don't remember what you did, but I DO remember that i'm supposed to hate you for it.
The wedding is over. Operation sleep with my step-sister has officially begun
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