I prefer the term 'tenderly watching'
such a stalker...
she wanted to love me. she just didn't know it yet.
sometimes I think that if I just met him. he would have a crazy realization and fall madly in love with me. what do you say? I'm not just another fan.
It was kinda bitchy last night when i brought up my pregnancy scare and you said "shotty playing with it"
Some girl just asked us for directions back to campus. we told her to take the first four lefts. We live on a block. she believed us
We can grow old together and our livers can fail together
I had such a pleasant walk of shame. The sun was shining, I smiled at all the high school suckers who judged me on their way to school, and I made friends with an old guy and his dog.
After my date left I rallied and took the Asian girl home. Flexibility my friend.
Perfect. Let's do that. I'm thinking everclear and green dye as our base. We shud start from there
I'm smoking a bowl with matches and a candle while my mother washes dishes downstairs. I thought adulthood was supposed to be different.
Almost caused a huge accident on the highway because I was distracted by how orange the road barrels were
i may or may not be making depth charges with cough syrup. i'll call you if i survive.
I was just trying to be a good friend but in retrospect I probably shouldn't have pepper sprayed you.
The next time we go out, we're bringing a jar so that people can contribute to the rest of what I need to come up with for my breast implants... We'll show them yours for inspiration and persuasion.
She's so high she just screamed into the pile of takeout boxes "which one of you gave me diarrhea"
Remember that time we were together? Yeah, I don't miss that.
Randomize
