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• (661): View more from California

  What the fuck I just showed up to court still drunk and the judge told me I smelled like his wife

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• (310): View more from California

  So is chris hansen cool in person? Or is it just awkward while you wait for the cops?

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• (302): View more from Delaware

  I thought if I stared at him long enough he'd walk me to my car. but he didn't. he dddidn't. i rreally thought i had those powers.

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• (414): View more from Wisconsin

  the jail released me with 39 mardi gras beads. I need details.

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  Is This New Dating App Elitist…Or Genius?

  Read it at the TFLN blog
  

• (404): View more from Georgia

  you left your shoes but remembered to take your vodka. i see where your priorities are.

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• (617): View more from Massachusetts

  so exactly what does one wear to an abortion clinic?

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• (519): View more from Ontario

  he said he has something really important to tell me but isn't ready yet. It's either that he loves me or has herpes

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• (702): View more from Nevada

  It's a line of coke at 10 a.m. kind of Saturday. Don't be a pussy about life.

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• (440): View more from Ohio

  well at least you didnt have sex with him. i feel like a proud mother. you always have sex with them.

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  Stay Away From These 29 Online Dating Red Flags

  Read it at the TFLN blog
  

• (512): View more from Texas

  I think I'm about to have sex with a second person before noon hehehhe! You're welcome America.

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• (408): View more from California

  who has not yet felt my sugrcially enhanced boobs. HurryI am at the bnar and it is 1:15 am

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• (626): View more from California

  Man in California was arrested for killing and eating a wild bobcat while high on crystal meth. Let's please NEVER get that high on anything...

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• (530): View more from California

  Would you and/or him be willing to dress up like the phantom, sing me music of the night and then bone the shit out of me? this is important.

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• (847): View more from Illinois

  Ok, maybe playing "whose family is most dysfunctional" wasn't the best drunk idea we've had. Todd''s been crying in the bathroom for an hour. We can't get him out...

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• (812): View more from Indiana

  Did I see you at the bar last night?

  (317): View more from Indiana

  Yes. You just kept grabbing my boobs and saying how much better they are than yours...

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