Its okay if i dont like him.his junk is just too good to resist.model penis,lame guy.
Honestly, where the fuck is osama bin laden?
I'd say this is worse than that time when I realized that my favorite bath toy growing up was my Mom's douche bottle.
just passed out again, this time at a subway. On a positive not they gave me a free sandwich, pretty sure out pity but at this point i don't care
Nothing says Welcome to America than having the international house watch a sorority girl puke over the edge of the porch at 8am.
there is nothing more depressing than your birth control alarm going off while you're masturbating, and realizing you've been taking pointless precautions for over a month now.
I really really need to have and out of body experience just so I can talk to myself about this shit that I'm doing with my life.
It was less of a bar, and more of an abandoned basement that some people sell booze in.
Do you remember lying across two tables saying 'go away I'm trying to pull' to me, Sollie and Sean?
Just got road head. In broad daylight. On the interstate. During rush hour. Pushing the envelope one public bj at a time.
No one should ever be so high that they forget the food. That's just...its a violation of God and Nature, of the very laws that we live by!
All I'm saying is that if he knows his wife walks around naked during the day, he shouldn't bring a friend home for lunch and show up unannounced.
Casey, if you want the continuing love of our mother, you're gonna need to stop drunk texting her from PCB.
This drunk girl kept yelling for water so I dipped a cup in the toilet and gave it to her. She was thanking me all night.
i don't care if you are my best friend. does not give you the right to describe how well my sister gives blowjobs.
how about your cousin?
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