That level of neurosis does not find love outside of Grey's Anatomy.
so i told my doctor my symptons and she just shook her head at me
i love marijuana more then i could love a human baby.
You were pissed we didn't change the movie to Eurotrip so you kept singing "Scotty Doesn't Know" over and over until you passed out.
I just want one of her status not to be about Jesus.
You grabbed her hand and started jacking her finger off. She was horrified.
Did it finish?
arnt you supposed to become a mature adult when you move out of your parents house?
Moving out doesnt mean I'm mature, it means I can make pancakes and bacon at 3 in the morning and no one can judge me.
Again??? Now we can't ever fucking go there again STOP PEEING IN FOYERS
I just said give me penis or give me death. Some patriot is rolling around in his grave right now.
He just pulled his sweatpants down and pissed in the middle of our garden
If the smell of things stopped me from putting things in my mouth. I wouldn't be popular with Grindr guys.
He told me that he wants to fuck me only wearing a princess tiara...How could I possibly say no to that?
Of two things I'm absolutely sure: 1. I only took 2 hits off that joint and 2. I definitely ran over hedwig on the way home
You're supposed to discourage my sluttiness not bring me hot Colombian men
I couldn't find my contact solution so I thought mixing toothpaste and water would work
Randomize
