last night was fun... but i spent all morning tring to get the candle wax out of my chest hair. We did use candles last night?
please remind me not to sleep with group members until after finals week.
Hey is it bad when your boss leans over your desk and tells you "you smell like the Rainforest Cafe"??
Our adventure is going to pick up his pipe and weed that he ditched when he got pulled over the other day.
HOT DATE.
dad just smoked me out. he's yelling at room service for not giving him cookies and milk with his towels...we're both too high to know if thats a legit complaint.
Yes, that was me on the jumbo tron. No, i don't know why i was hiding.
there is a dorito bag in my car full of my mouth blood
For months it was all good and well just having sex. Now, something in me has snapped and I'm dreaming of taking turtleneck Christmas pictures with him. Fuck you, we're going out tonight. I need this.
It must suffice lest there secretly exist a picture of me walking out of the ocean at midnight naked and half mast with a sea urchin on my ass
... Cuz there's nothing like having your two male roommates catching you have a good cry in the driveway at 9am on a Wednesday.
You puked on the bar then proceeded to walk out. I told the bartender some girl walked up, puked and left and he gave me a free drink. Hope you got home safe.
She was way too drunk so I dropped her off at her house and smoked a huge blunt with her mom.
Just got referred to as "the girl from Tuesday night" at the Taco Bell drive thru...what happened on my birthday?!
Are u alive? If u are, you deserve an award.
He hand fed me trail mix then I watched the video of me the next morning. He was actually feeding me meow mix.....that drunk. I still have no regrets marrying him
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