Nice. Sry i missed. Also sorry that i pissed on my toothbrush last nite
Sink seemed easy target but balance was no good
Eww. Jon Gosselin got both his ears pierced.
He looks like a bad one night stand.
Yes..we had amazing sex that I have a 50 percent chance of remembering.
And your hair- I'd make sure to pee on it first.
Police were closing down the bar due to gunfight and I was crying because they wouldn't let me finish putting temporary shamrock tats on my boobs
You know me. Don't need roses, just dick and food.
He's used the term "balls deep" 3 times in the first hour. Thanks a lot, Plenty of Fish.
Come over. We have tacos... And girls who took their clothes off. But mainly, tacos.
My mom just told me the story of how she met my dad through prison. How was your saturday?
He is 30 (that's 8 years older than I am) and uses more Emojis than I do. Problem?
Your vagina doesn't want to be violated with garnishes. I get it.
whatever. i don't need to be drunk to tell you i'd suck your dick if you had one.
Can I just go naked and covered in glitter?
I just ate part of my sock, this has got to stop.
My husband found the cock ring I bought my FWB. I told him it was napkin holder and he believed me. And that’s why I need a side dick
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