she asked me if the dress made her look fat, i told her no - the fat made her look fat.
I want to make a zoo with you.
Is it bad that your cum tickles when I swallow it?
I cant believe Lindsay Lohan feels like this every day
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just watched a girl in the library pull a vodka bottle out of her bag. I think I'm going to give her my number.
I had to brake up with him.
In my experience drinking helps.
You dont want to know why?
Not really. I want to drink.
I wiped my mouth this morning with a pine tree branch after I threw up on the side of the road. Tis the season
Hardcore start to spring break. Mike is wearing adult diapers because the only stop we are making is for gas.
Just made out with a girl I dated in high school, and she told me her girlfriend likes me. I like where this is going.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
who started the 'put a scrunchy' around his balls' game?
I just found a weed leaf in my leg hair..
My cat is watching me play with my new vibrator
So it turns out strippers do encores if enough people yell. Encore song: Self Esteem.
I'm in the upstairs bathroom. I went to the bathroom after class and realized this is not a shit I want to have publicly. I ran home. We can go to lunch, just give me a min
He had me sit on his face until I begged him to stop, then held me there 5 minutes longer. I rested my head on his chest, told him I needed time to recover....and slept for 6 hours. By the time I woke, he was already at work. I just sent him a countdown times until his shift is over.
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