Is it really that bad? I heard it was like pooping. I like pooping.
no, i'm proud of you. this is the happiest you've been since you discovered that bowls can be used as cups if you don't feel like washing dishes.
End of the semester and I banged 14 freshman. I'm like my own welcome to college orientation guide.
He just brought me a wine glass. Full of Tequila. Ignore any texts after this one.
That's why you NEVER put anything a stripper gave you in your mouth
Also there's a dick sized hole in my tights...should I be worried?
one of them held the wheel while the other one changed her pants. while driving. on the thruway. what
Rick Santorum just suspended his campaign. Lets celebrate by watching gay pornography together.
I'm currently looking through google images of circumsized penises and realizing how vital pre-marital sex is.
I would come over if there was not the impending fear of me shitting out my brains.
Dressing as mugato from zoolander Halloween you may want to be the hand model. We can get you a fish bowl filled with Clementine Vodka and soda you can put your hand in.
I'm graduating college in 4 days. I already miss the bad decisions
My only contacts are booty calls or the club hockey team.
my extended weekend of being as irresponsible as possible started with blowing the bartender in the bar bathroom. off to a good start.
i solemnly vow to never stick my penis into crazy again
I give it a week.
Randomize