Go to google and type XXX
.......Is that how you look for porn?
going to class early so i have time to go on the moonbounce. this is why i go to art school.
I wish my new phone didn't autocorrect so well. People will never experience the magic of my drunk texts because they think I'm making a coherent statement.
My RA just tried to write me up for having sex too loudly during quiet hours.
What is the pluralization of human? I just got humen rejected, and I am going completely blank...
Exactly how low is masturbating to your cute professor's lecture videos?
I noticed how good my hair still looked. Apparently rum and coke in it helps it stay curly thru sex. May be using this more often.
Hhahaha he is. Omg the new polish friend just took his pants off in front of me. There is something wrong with this nationality.
Just sneezed out a half gram of coke into a tissue. Four hours after the fact. The bender continues.
My nephew just told me I smell like apathy and regret. Thats the hangover I'm dealing with
But the drunk streaking fizzled when one of jake's friends took a piss while running with a massive erection.
There's something very strange about masturbating in a hotel room. I feel like I'm cheating on my room...
I most definitely just found a video on my phone that I accidentally took... You can't see anything and all you can hear is me talking about how good your water was... And then I fed it to you... And used the word "eloquent" to describe it.
the puppy had a little leather gag and was using a ball gag as a fetch toy
Look, I tried but his dick tasted like disappointment.
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