So there are ramen noodles in the shower you need to explain...
Remember when the only STD we had to worry about were hickies? Those were the days
For Halloween this year I'm gonna go as Angelina from Jersey Shore. I'm gonna yell "umm HELLO?!," cockblock someone, then leave the party early
I Just paid off the bartender to help me convince this chic my roommate's gay. This is the best cockblock ever.
you made me have a moment of silence for the half of a sub sandwich that you dropped on the floor earlier
Dude... there's chunks of hair all over the floor, and no one knows how they got there. You guys just made out right?
he was banged his ex for coke the whole time and is still the best guy so far this year. standards need to be raised.
attractive or not, he has more than one book on serial killers. i'm gonna get out of here while i can
I've been smoking weed using candles all week and I just found a lighter. This may truly be the happiest moment of my life. It's embarrassing how excited I got
Wait I'm all alone with a guy and his turtle
how fucking stupid do you have to be to think I'm going to accept your friend request months after falling asleep during one night stand sex?
ELLEHCIM
NYRMAK
DRAHCIR
WHAT??
Wanna see if we can get cut off at bdubs again? The same hipster manager that is younger than us is working again
Hungover on St. Patrick's Day. I did this backwards.
Found my bra in the fridge. See you in 10 mins. It's gonna be a good fuckin day!
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