I think my grandma died before she was convinced I was straight
Applied 4 a nanny job usin a Legit Site. Xplain to me how the couple I found offered me a 3some complete with 'sexy pics' of the wife blowin hubby. wtf?
obviously you're part succubus.
the mole on his forehead could get me off better than his dick
please tell me you have proof of this
champagne bombs. Yes, i think that is where things may have gotten out of control.
It honestly wasnt my fault this time. i was in shock. WHO THE FUCK OWNS A PEACOCK?!
sorry can't make it tonight, greg's getting back from italy. he's had two weeks of carbs and no gym; now's my chance to get myself a piece of that newly-fat, low self-esteemed ass.
I may or may not have traded sexual favors for Disney on Ice tickets.
I vaguely remember taking a yard light, holding it up like the statue of liberty, and all of us at the party chanting the national anthem. What a glorious night
Day drinking! Today! (tomorrow too!) Our place! Whenever you get off work! Ready go!
He's gonna do me a solid for doing her a solid. It's like pay it foward. But with sex.
Puke-y regrets or just things-seem-far-away regrets?
Whoever said it shouldn't take a man to make you happy clearly wasn't having sex everyday.
The squirrels were at the front door. Dude I swear..
Nope. Im a prince of the americas. I treat my women like future queens. Also, im drunk watching the royal wedding
I can't believe I slept with a girl who has the words shucks in her vocabulary. I'm getting less picky by the day..
Randomize
