i don't plan on having that self control this summer
We took shots in honor of Shark Week.
wow, so sex, not that great its like masturbating with a warm towelette, like the kind you get at a japanese restaurant
I just saw someone marching around outside wearing only a loincloth, dragging a fuckton of sheet metal. Spring has Sprung.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Tidal wave of highness just hit. Find shelter and catnip. gloves. zebra striped car washes.
On another note, why did I wake up wrapped in bubble wrap. I can only assume it was for my own safety
It's ok, I like adventure. Just ask my vagina.
I forgot to tell you, wear something you can puke on Saturday. We're christening this marriage with a shot of jager. NOT KIDDING.
I have a weapon and I'm not blacked out. Good as gold
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He put his hand in my cleavage. NOT ON. IN. BETWEEN. NO more gingers
If we order a pizza and I contribute 9 cents, is that fair?
He stood me up.
I'm no sure if I should be pissed or proud that he finally grew a backbone.
I can't even spell what he said he was on. And I had to call 4 people before someone had heard of it.
He is a sex God. It lasted more than an hour, and I don't remember how many times I came. I lost count at 57.
I'm sorry I missed your birthday brunch. If it makes you feel any better I woke up wearing someone else's toga and a sombrero
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