remember that time that crown gas station wouldn't sell us a lighter so we had to use matches and birthday candles to smoke with a toilet paper roll? sometimes i miss high school
I'm so never shaving my vag in a target bathroom for him again.
question. what would be the least awkward way to ask your one night stand if he came inside of you because you would really prefer not to have his illegitimate lovechild. hypothetically.
what part of covering your puke with shaving cream seemed like a good idea?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you need to not memorize your credit card number for drunk pizza
I'm wearing an NBA shooting sleeve while jerking off...and yes my arm has stayed warm
I think he liked me better when I only opened my mouth to suck his dick.
He had a curved dick....must be a european thing
he tried breathing fire using moonshine and a roman candle. would not have believed it unless i actually witnessed it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Idk. Last year there was an ice luge, glow in the dark jungle juice, and lots of naked people. I feel like I'll get pregnant just thinking about going to that party.
The closest thing to a sext that you will ever receive from me is a picture of pepperonis on Greg's asscheeks, clenching.
Can I color on your dick again?
I'm not in it for just the sex. If I wanted mediocre dick once a week I would have stayed with one of my exes.
I tried to text you about going to the Lion's Den but sent it to my boss. She was down for it. Please advise.
i asked your drunk ass where the fuck you were going and you screamed “WENDY’S BITCH”.
Randomize