found out the liquor store price matches. thus begins senior year of college
His dick was poking my bladder. That big...
Just heard the words 'Pussy Riot' on NPR...I almost crashed my car.
You threw my heel at her from across the street... And hit her in the back of the head so hard she face planted into the street. I need more friends like you.
This is the first time I'm hearing this information.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Bless her heart. Her stupid, drunk, adderall-ed heart.
Got drunk and passed out flintstone vitamins to everyone at the bar. I'm just so god damn motherly
I woke up this morning with 3 phone numbers, a red Chinese New Year envelope with cash in it, and a winning scratcher all stuffed in my bra. I'd say it was a pretty successful Thursday night.
You kept hiding under tables and grabbing people's legs and shouting SHARK ATTACK.
A stranger came up to me, pointed at my drink and asked what it tasted like and proceeded to chug half of it and then walked away.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
No he can't come. I swear to gods he's "Why We Can't Have Nice Things" given physical form.
I am praying to every god I can that he drank so much that he won't even remember me
I'm serenading his dick with my words. I understand how poets get inspiration now.
It was a good hour of moans, penis compliments, smacks, and what sounded like someone running in flip flops
Obviously you're feeling a little sexually frustrated.
I consider humping a stranger every ten minutes when I walk in the street.
got cock blocked by the cops again. two of the cops were the same ones from that t bell incident and they recognized me... they still dont like me
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