At my boss' house at a bbq. Had a few beers. Taking a poop - there's no TP...this is my nightmare.
Does having sex in the men's bathroom on the boardwalk count as having sex on the beach?
i think our first tip to leave should have been when we saw the drinks were coming out of a gas can
there was a trail of blood coming out of one of the bathroom stalls. thought of you
she's doing key bumps of parmesean cheese
I legitimately forgot how to blow my nose just now. Sleep might be handy.
It would be like a dance party with a dick inside you. I think that's what Ke$ha wants for the world.
When he saw my tits he said "wow you should be proud.
How bad would it be if I asked him for my "ho ho ho" thong back? They're my fav christmas pair!
I woke up in a strange bathroom. Was I blonde when you left me last night?
And now you understand the importance of Saturday naps.
Because you stay up all night having sex and eating sushi?
I have this rep as a wingman for a reason. I'm like a poon caddy. "You might want to use a 9 iron on this hole. "
Don't go to sleep yet I need your Mexican roots. Can you come make guacamole
All I remember about last st pattys day was I was in a bathtub with full bubbles, fully clothed, drinking out of a flamingo lawn ornament that someone cut a hole in.
Woke up with a glow stick in my boobs this morning. Must've dominated Sunday.
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