In the future we'll all be gay
You put your red cup in a chain link fence and kept telling me you could use it as a telescope
Ordered a large pizza and definitely just paid the cab driver in pizza slices. I'm glad there's someone out there that's just as fat at heart as we are.
Well girls crying gets you hard so you're not really a good standard to me
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So take that alcohol. I still win. I ALWAYS WIN. Plus i didn't have to wear clothes. DOUBLE WIN.
We fed him just...so many bright colored crayons when he was blacked out. I hope he looks at his shits because this could be all for nothing
Also one of my neighbors is blasting "pumped up kicks" and possibly butchering some chickens
My dad used the quotation mark gesture with his hands when he asked how my "roommate" was doing.
That may be because I drunkenly sent him a pick of you two curled up together like kittens. Two very buff kittens.
why do all the dudes in this porno look like billy ray cyrus
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Any chance I can buy my dignity back with $45?
I have commenced my lesbian college experimentation. Wish me luck
Woke up in a fanny pack with a bag of cocaine on my cheek
It's my birthday, if I want to stay home, get stoned and watch the gameshow network, that's what I'm going to do.
I'm at her wedding and she managed to get every single one night stand I ever had in her wedding party. Why does she hate me?
We’ve got a propane heater on our back porch if you want to come over and eat a McRib in peace
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