aw he's cute...not in a i wanna rip his clothes off way more of a put him in my pocket and keep him as a pet
And occasionally lick whipped cream off them abs
Exactly.
RIP Summer 2010. God knows it had to be one of us..
Also managed to rip my pants and set myself on fire. And oddly enough I'm still not ready to ask for 2010 back.
Don't be offended. I can't even stand sleeping next to my dildo after I'm done, let alone a whole person.
I am currently listening to someone take a shit. I hate the hole in the ceiling.
He's coming back with me for the week. It took me saying "I don't wanna drive myself home... I'm better as a passenger giving road head" for him to jump at it. Rack another one up for my magical openings.
Well, I just did coke with a drag queen in a bathroom so that's the direction this night is taking
Congratulations on your lack of fetus.
I vote for a trading skills night. You teach me to juggle, I'll teach you knife fighting, and we'll both learn banjo
He passed out in the car on the way to the party. Seabiscuit tripped before the race even started....Lil bitch....
Prop 8 repealed and I FINALLY got my period. Good day for America!!!
Besides the one of you shaking your cock for 10sec that was one of the best snapchat's ever haha
One day I'm gonna have to send my roommate a "sorry I got high and forgot you were in the room and masturbated next to you" fruit basket
My vagina just clenched in fear
I sure hope so...I wonder if he could tell in that email that I'm really good at blow jobs. Hopefully he heard that tone. Any means necessary.
Randomize
