normally I beat off every night before I go to bed even though my little brother sleeps in the same room. So I was starting to last night, and he jumped out of bed and said "Fuck, Im not listening to this shit again" We havent talked since. fuck me
My recently uploaded pictures to facebook: Me partying on Beale St. with a single girl on each arm. Ex's recently upload pictures: Several pictures of cats. I win.
I don't know what kind of drugs you were on last night but you kept trying to highlight my face because you said I was important
I'm actually glad you're quitting. Now there's one less person at work who's seen me naked.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I swear after i took it all i did was scream for four hours
If im still in the bathroom puking when the sirens go off please distract the cops.
Without me, you would never be able to say you partied with a midget!
It started as a joke and ended with a trip to the emergency room, a broken macbook and a gigantic hole in the concrete of my driveway.
I was just about to send a concerned text until I opened my door and saw a shopping cart. I'm glad you made it home in one piece and with toys.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Puked in the trees at home depot, I told everyone it was fertilizeerr
I think that's the key to being an adult though... Get those rapid fire beer shits out I the way early, then you can go about your grown man business
Judging by the fact that he asked me if i wanted to serenade him using cocaine and Taylor Swift I'd say I so have it in the bag.
i went to the 24h massage place last night and brought down the price for a hand job from $50 to $12.75 and half the big mac left in my bag.
I was angry that a college kid had a new Audi
so I peed on it
I don't know where I keep finding these guys, but mi power bottoms es su power bottoms.
Randomize