He yelled GOOOOAAAALLL when he came.
Last night was an abortion. I might need a publicist.
i woke up with someone drivers licenses in my wallet this am...he said i don't have a business card so just take my drivers license
i wish my penis had a tongue
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I refuse to have another spring break doomed by pregnancy.
She had her underwear around her neck. No one can tell me i'm a slut now.
I'm sorry I compared your vagina to nascar
Just pull your dick out and wink at her, its a game changing play
I took 20 bucks from you because when I woke up I saw more of you than I ever wanted to see bro.
Totally acceptable.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You straddled the banister and fell down the stairs, then proceeded to crawl back up them, I think you need to lay down
I missed rounds this morning...my senior resident hooked me up to and IV and made me stay in the clinic because he said I didn't look presentable enough to walk around the hospital
Remember that time you gave me a fat lip with your vag? We should do that again!
Hi, my name is Ashslay and I'll be your designated shitshow.
Best orgasm I ever had! I though we totally connected and I asked him to stay over. He went back to the sigma chi house and returned with his blankie and a 40. please help
My phone has started autocorrecting "monogamy" to "monogamish"
Randomize