I took shrooms, thc and molly but its okay i'm surrounded by freaks
the night i cant remember will be the night i always remember thanks to my "i
I wish your couch was made out of beer. I would drink like half of it.
it was beautiful and magic like when a hot girl grabs her own tits and smiles at you
That girl you went home with last night was dressed in a bright blue sweats at the bar. 205lb Smurffete FTL. Boy were you in epic form.
Not cool at all. Last night I organized my condoms by expiration date. I need to get laid.
it's like a replay of two fridays ago...except not in a motel and i'm not having sex in the shower.
For some reason i am carrying prostate cancer brochures. i am nor used to drinking this early.
Let me start this apology by saying you were the finest piece of ass I ever had.
I don't know ur idea of a good first date but I'm pretty sure it shouldn't include him holding my hair while I puke in the street
I thought turtle was a code word for weed until he pulled out a baby turtle from his pocket and said "$20 for a turtle"
I'm 11 for 13 getting drunker than the person who's birthday it is
sending him nudies in gran's hospital bathroom. you?
my vagina is like this close to growling at me and leading me onto the nearest dance floor
make it buy you a drink first
I think my ph in my vagina is actually off from the lack of sex I've had this break compared to finals week.
Randomize
