I really like him. That's why I'm having sex with someone else, so he doesnt think i'm a slut.
New boss looks like john cusack in a collar. Hot. Why do i always want to have sex with priests?
i just know my balls have never hurt this bad before
you said you get the best orgasms off Pez dispensers. how do you think he felt????
im at a loss of words.... a stripper is dancing to a Justin Bieber song.
if that dog is afraid of alcohol then he's no dog of mine
You seriously looked at the house acorss the street and implied that you thought they had nice Easters.
I think I left my camera at your house. It would be in both of our best interests if you don't go through the pics.
do you think its obvious that we spent all afternoon playing naked body oil twister?
There is a literally infinite number of spliffs going around this table.
Delicious
I feel like I'm at a sushi bar with a spliff belt.
My roommate walked in naked grabbed my hand and pulled me into her room to see her randoms dick.
Everything was going well until he very loudly said that he wanted to cum on my fingernails.
avocado toast wont fix the fact you did a bunch of blow you fucking hipster
I'm the one who said we should take things slow. I'm also the one who forced him into the back on my car so we could have sex.
My butthole is tingling. Must be the grapefruit juice
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