Playing drinking games to Nancy Grace totally counts as "keeping up with current events.."
I think I'm cybering, it's been a while and its more in depth than it was in 8Th grade.
thank you for introducing me to everyone on chat roulette as I was passed out.
Stop staring at my boobs, I can't concentrate
Well how do you think I feel
fair enough
My life has literally become a dickpocolypse. Thank you, summer, I missed you.
it took me 7 solid minutes to realize "egggGSaucetingf" meant "exhausting"
Beer lympzucs are ki7lling me
She just tried to snort granola up her nose but its ok she's not bleeding.
I stuck a note to his door with my gum explaining why i couldn't spend the night. as i was walking away, he opened the door...i fell down and played dead. deffinitly didn't see me.
He tried to spell out "PROM?" in his cum on my stomach during sex. It was terrible
well did you say yes?
if I open my eyes, my head will explode. that hungover.
Sidenote: do you recall your "give me the d" chant
I'd like to request an "its my birthday discount", and for you to bartend shirtless tonight ;)
im watching blue is the warmest color at the music box and this dude is literally masturbating 3 feet in front of me
I just set my messenger to Away so I could run downstairs to masturbate. Working from home is the BEST
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