Conclusion from last night: Sometimes being classy isn't as fun as making out with a guy on a pooltable in a bar. Happy birthday, Canada.
I didn't know people actually cried after sex.
apparently the dude across the street has been dead for like a month. now I feel bad about pissing on his lawn
My alcohol tolerance is way too high for this paycheck.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I took the chef home. His dick even tasted like garlic
Im not gonna remember this tomorrow but the real money is in coke i wanna get a dark wood desk and cell coke then i can own taco bell and the xxl chalupa will be mine
way to not show up for Habitat for Humanity, real classy...
I saved lives by not driving this morning
Land Before Time marathon. we drink every time littlefoot almost eats a treestar.
Your excessive judging is making this uncomfortable
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He yearns for your heart.
He needs to stop being a pussy about it.
Well I just finished dry heaving so I think breakfast is a little further out for me
So i stood up out of the sunroof while he gave me oral. Car was still moving. Exactly how illegal is that?
I'm the kind of gay who carries his anxiety medication in case the club scene gets too fierce
I'm worried my dog collar isn't going to come in time. I might be trying on dog collars at PetSmart next week. That could get awkward.
Idk but when you think about it the last time I did bottomless mimosas I ended up getting my nipples pierced so it might be fair
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