I've decided to film a documentary centered around how he manages to keep that beast caged in such tight pants
Is making out on a toilet while he is sitting down and pissing weird? cause that's what happened last night
It's sad really how 5 am brings with it a distinction from drunken to pathetic.
He just did blow off my nipples. He's not serious about his girlfriend.
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If him repeating sorry while thrusting isn't makeup sex than I don't know what else is
I think im gonna bang this 35 year old at a kids birthday party in the bathroom at this house while the kids open the presents.
I haven't received a dick pic from him lately. He's not even my boyfriend and I'm concerned. I hope he's alright.
How does she have a hairless cat and a husband it's not fair. Both are hard to come by
We are 100% horrible people, and im extremely happy we are friends
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We were getting fries and you hopped the counter and yelled "WELCOME TO GOOD BURGER HOME OF THE GOOD BURGER" and threw up
She was chasing her shots with beefaroni and I think I fell in love.
You were hitting on girls while wearing the banana suit. When they rejected you you yelled "I gotta split anyway."
Pretty sure my parents just hear me get off from the living room but I feel like they should be proud that I did it without a man honestly.
Idk I saw a cheetah print onesie and it reminded me of your Lion King fantasy.
Come on in. I'm butt naked, in the kitchen, eating ice pops
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