Dual, econ, hell, shiv, aunt, puppy. 1 out of 6. T9 word needs to learn how to cuss like me.
his status popped up and said 'probably going to jail.' it took everything i had not to press the like button
my brother walked in while we were fucking, silently took my bong from my closet, saluted us and walked out.
This is working out surprisingly well considering it started out with us using a christmas tree as a battering ram
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Apparently I spent my 300 dollar tax return by ordering ramen on amazon last night. Please tell me this will somehow pay off in the long run.
Doing blow at 6am to "wake myself up for clinicals" was a baaaaad idea
one of them held the wheel while the other one changed her pants. while driving. on the thruway. what
Three people drank on "never have I had sex in a tractor." Iowa at its best?
Seriously, I am going to crawl in a hole, sew my vagina shut, and spit acid on any man that comes near me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well I'm sleeping with two of them cause they have nice cars. And the third cause she has a big rack. I'm just really waiting for it all to blow up in my face so I can find a girl I'm actually interested in
He sat down, pointed at my Converse and said "I have the same shoes." I thought "I'm going to have sex with you by the end of the night."
The doctor said that if they accidentally damage my nerve endings I could permanently lose feeling in my lower jaw.. Honestly the first thing that came to mind was how that would affect my blowjob skills.
Was it cause you feel bad for the ridiculousness my vagina goes through because same
Just made a drug contact standing in the sandwich line in the dining hall. Is this real life?
You're my fucking hero.
Hi darlin, what are you doing tonight?
.... Things I will not be proud of
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