That was definitely a porn plot just waiting to develop...
they said they heard you say put it in my butt
so how do you plan on seducing my econ TA?
by telling him that he has a large supply and that i demand it...in my mouth. it shows him that i'm slutty and that i pay attention in econ
Confirm for me that it's be a bad idea to sleep with the 50 year old that's currently hitting on me?
I just want you to sit on my face and to tell you you're pretty. Most girls would leap at this opportunity.
I feel like somebody took my brain out. Stomped on it with cleats. And then put it back together with a glue stick. Thank you.
Once he blows his load, he's more of an immediate flight risk than that jetBlue pilot. He's out the door before his cum is out of my vajayjay.
You know its been a rough night when for a large portion of the evening you have accepted your death
You said that we all need to "head out like a boner through sweatpants and get fucked." Jager night was a success.
I'll just put on a bunch of mascara and cry right before I get there. Then everyone will recognize me.
I need a hug and tequila
I'm sitting next to a milk crate full of tequila right now
This is why we need to live in the same city again
He's saved in my phone as 'MURICA. I think it's safe to say I'm not exactly taking him seriously.
Someone broke in while we were at the bars, window is shattered but nothing got taken
Noone broke in, matt tried to pull a tyrese and punch through the window... were at the hospital.
You told her you double majored in Geology and Telekinesis. When has that line ever worked for you?
My feelings for him are donzo molonzo but I can't turn down a pierced penis...
Randomize
