Google if cops ever smoke weeds and then bust them. I need to know immidiately.
I have a story that starts with Nutella and ends with sex in the laundry building at RIT.
Hopefully. Play it cool. Bust out a few jokes. Chew with your mouth closed and show your boobs.
Just did lines off your face, congrats on getting in the magazine bro
You told the cop at mobil to keep it real and look both ways before crossing the street.
I have a completly random but serious question. Can I make a paper mache mold of you ass and turn it into a pinata filled with airplane bottles of liquor? Its for my art class
Last night after the bar I went home and ate a pulled pork sandwich in a bubble bath
in the future when you find clothing in your street, just assume it's mine.
Are there any rules against fucking the hot TA?
Maybe for her....
Her problem, not mine
Why is there a cash register on top of my car?
You merely adopted the alcohol. I was born into it. Molded by it. I didn't see the hang over until I was a man and by then it was only blinding.
I still can't believe a guy pooped in my backyard
i'm extremely hungover on the ski bus and the driver is playing abba. this. is. not. okay.
That butt dial turned into a booty call.
You know that we wouldn’t even be talking about all this if you would have kept your candy consumption judgement comments to yourself.
Randomize
