party is dying down. we just wrote whore in the yard with gas. Photos to come.
I can't believe you made out with me with a french fry in your mouth.
You mean 'full wolf form' wasn't a drunk text?
Just spent the last three hours in the library successfully refreshing facebook
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Walked into a liquor store bleeding. That kind of night.
I puked in the revolving door and had to sit down on the escalator. That hungover. It's safe to say people are judging me.
you're surprised the chick that fucked you for a free cup has herpes. i don't feel bad for you.
im really going to miss that car, so many blow jobs...
I mean it's not my fault he had a floor mat that read "put out or get out". What was I supposed to do?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Thats not how it works. You get the Rachel, and then Rachel kicks you out. Don't linger or try to cuddle, its just pathetic and makes me look down on you and your penis
I should have slept with you when you were wearing the gorilla suit. I've had dreams about your chest hair. I hope jail wasn't too bad.
I'm making myself a nametag with my contact info and pinning it to myself like a kindergardenter in case I get lost when I black out on Sat.
Can we laminate it? Just to be safe.
Know what was probably a bad idea? Using white wine as a mixer for vodka.
This bird just went for my eyes. Does he think I'm dead???
I kept falling all over the place and yelled at the bouncer you can't kick me out I'm from Texas.
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