Five Mah tais Laser and i skill have not drunk dial you
It tastes like I coughed up blood....hello liver damage, I've been expecting you.
woke up next to her writing my name in some journal. apparently she makes every guy she hooks up with sign out.
apparently he's bringing me two things i like. he said one was him and i'm assuming the other one is his penis
I feel like my teeth are caked on with other teeth. What did I just smoke?
In that case, I'll try 2 find a date. But my options are AA friends or fuck buddies.
I DON'T WANT TO DEMONSTRATE MY DICK TAKING ABILITIES WITH MY MOM THERE.
All you have to do is speak. Your voice reverberates strait to my vagina.
He's so drunk he thinks he's the ultimate warrior. Told cops he was from parts unknown. Never broke character
I just want to fall into a pit of xannies and eat my way out.
He would come to class in wrapped in nothing but a pink towel
Nautical themed porn is also great bc someone usually wears a captains hat
Just had a med school interview with that doctor I fucked in college. He remembered. Asked if I still have my nipple rings. Overall, I think it went well.
Now just crop his dad out and add it to the spank bank.
Im too stoned for my mom to be picking up hitch hikers. Help.
Randomize
