look, i may have sacrified a 20% assignment for a sprite. this is what hangovers do to me.
hah yeah. there was a kid puking in the bathroom and this idiot brings in a potted plant and was like "yeah he's like, not getting enough oxygen"
dude, boobs are like the porridge in goldylocks
i had to pay fifty dollars for throwing up in the limo, 60 fucking dollars to throw up all over myself
its preseason football. its like non alcoholic beer. who gives a fuck
I have to think about this realistically and not with my vagina.
Also, turning on the light this morning was a 3 step process. Way too hungover.
I may not have eyeballs after all the drunk naked people having sex outside.
pretty sure I just came the closest to throwing up in my pants that I'm ever gonna get. I'd like to thank the academy and the hangover thatt I hope actually kills me in the morning.
cant tell, his cock is acting like one of those inflatable arm waving things outside the market
Your first mistake was not throwing your beer at the RA and running
I have three different pairs of earrings at three different houses including your 16 year old brothers nightstand. Look at my life. Look at my choices
Man, coughing on your period is like the biggest gamble a girl can make.
Every guy I've ever fucked is single right now
Pray for me
I would totally suck a dick for some poutine right now
Randomize
