you still trying to smash that chick?
it's a losing battle and she kinda sucks. been busy with school so not getting midweek drunk - she's nearly unbearable sober
clay aiken is like melissa ehteridge without the guitar.
I have so many mobile devices now, I only use my laptop for porn.
if that dog is afraid of alcohol then he's no dog of mine
Just checked an empty cooler on the flight to Notre Dame. You don't have to tell me you're jealous, I already know.
Have you ever wondered what your stripper song would be?
Fuckkkk i made out with a freshman.....but he's old for his age. THIS IS WHAT HAPPENS WHEN YOURE NOT AROUND.
this ms. usa coverage has sucessfully humbled every girl here. depressed fish in a leaky barrel. go!
First and foremost she's my friend, but she's also a mistake I make when I'm drunk
Well, I'm off to go seduce a gay man. In 10 years when I'm 300 pounds, sitting in a mumu surrounded by my 500 cats, remind me of this text. That way I can be like "ohhh THERE'S where I went wrong!!"
i was mezmorized. she was the most beautiful girl that looked like a boy i ever seen
Spending 4 hours in the emergency room today tells me that your birthday party was a success.
I mean, the sex was awesome last weekend, but I didn't even imagine I'd reached ovarian rupture status.
BTW car sex works all the muscle groups. Just sayin. Legs/butt are sore as are arms, back and core.
I Woke up still tied to the bed. I would say, it was a good night!
Randomize
