you didnt say anything until i brought it up today. i guess i misjudged your maturity.
I guess I misjudged your gender.
Me too. I'd like to spend all next summer high and drunk and riding ponies and boys.
Lets get really high and only speak Spanish to each other again tonight
Stripper fight on main stage. It just happened. And it was glorious.
My leg won't stop wagging. It's like it's congratulating my vagina.
Joe decreed the livingroom and the hallway up to the burn mark his kingdom. I think this is the point of 'stage an intervention'
Last thing i remember is pounding jager and puking in that nerds george foreman grill. Then i wake up this morning with some random tooth brush in my mouth
I hope it's the birth control, otherwise I'm dying
The bachelorette started when I opened the door and they threw a few dozen dildos at me.
He said "you speak American pretty good for a Canadian" and it took everything in me to still fuck him. Dry spell ended btw
That's a lot of judgement coming from a man wearing a dress made from a bedsheet.
After fooling around at the hotel til dawn, I managed to feed her with my free buffet passes. Tastes like sweet victory.
Fuck off. Since when do you love him??
Since he licked my arm to retrieve the macaroni and cheese he dropped. You have to appreciate that
Can't even lie. Mad respect
Just calling to thank you for not dying. I love you.
Bold words for someone NOT on a unicycle
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