This guy sitting next to me just bought a plot of land off the internet. On a whim. In the middle of class
One of her kids, Dakota I think, got stuck in a ceiling fan and she had a fit, thats when she found the penis hat.
Not even drunk me wanted to have sex with him. I kept intentionally hitting my head on the table behind me during sex till he said i was too drunk for sex.
I had a dream about a turtle sitting on top of a horse skull. I'm certain its a symbol for my dead sex life. Trust me.
I was pissed last night bc this girl didn't want to have sex but offered to reimburse me for the condoms. That just made me upset
I dont know. Theres no way you can be ready for the sex hurricane that will consume you.
the only good thing about going home with him was that he was prettier than me.
Regardless of your intentions, deep throating a Twinkie is NOT sexy. You owe that poor cashier an apology the next time you pump gas.
I need to have sex. It's becoming like a matter of public safety.
I'm good. We walked you back to my apartment and you demanded to eat the sandwich I made for him
Grab some lube and condoms and you get a free shirt? College is weird
Your normalization of crazy is frightening.
I'm a stupid stupid woman who is totally going to rock this holiday season dick drunk on that Ginger
Sorry I banged your sister. But in my defense you ain't fucked me in a month. In fact I should get a medal for keeping it in your family.
We live walking distance from the coors factory. no, we do not have a dry week.
Randomize
