Canada is now making docos about life in America. Its called Trailer Park Boys.
I look like a poor person in the cast of Gay Oliver.
We decided to smoke and then made crosses on our foreheads for ash wednesday
mom would be proud
We had a complete conversation while I was giving him head, at one point he even stopped me and said 'I love how we're just hanging out.'
we went to the store to buy cookie dough and conditionally went straight towards the booze
A piece of cheeseburger just fell between my tits. Consider this a "wish you were here" postcard.
I can't believe i facilitated a beer for sweater vest deal last night...
He woke up, got my bottle of water and poured it on me and then went back to sleep. Not really how I want to wake up at 2 a.m.
Bullshit. No way. If I brushed past your penis it was completely coincidental.
Why put me through the conflicting battle of being happy for your vagina but sad for my vagina for no reason ahole
Just passed the animal clinic parking lot I had to pull over to puke in during welcome week. I can almost hear the dogs barking at my shame again.
He wants to pour butter pecan flavored coffee creamer on me and lick it off. I'm like, dude, gross. French Vanilla ok? Ugh.
Date with Air Force guy was nice btw. And for my next trick I'll talk him into fucking me in his fighter jet at 30,000 ft.
If the guys trying to booty call text me could see me right now in some raggedy pajamas with toothpaste down the front of my shirt eating pepperoni out of the package they might change their minds
I've never been so excited to be bleeding from my vagina.
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