The great thing about skinny blondes is that they're all interchangeable.
His fuck buddy just got fake tits and wants him to 'come break them in.' I need his life.
And I don't know what it is about weed making me want every episode of the real housewives of everywhere
So I fucked her. If you're keeping score at home, it's all tied up with horrible sex with someone I like and great sex with someone I hate both with 1.
just won 200$ from the school for "liking" the anti-alcohol seminar. putting it to good use
how?
not even kidding, my fake id is arriving in 6-8 business days
With a few pieces of metal and duct tape and a bong was created
I danced with this guy last night, I left like I was humped by a blind baby kangaroo trying to body-box.
You know you can't live off of vodka and pizza rolls forever
I'VE ALREADY MADE MY CHOICE
He said he didnt want to choke me, I said im sorry thats a deal breaker.
I want to be "performing a disservice to society by actually wearing clothes in public" hot.
Playing Cards Against Humanity with my relatives at Christmas while I'm stoned was a bad idea...
ok so i got home drunk and was cleaning my kitchen and i was shaking out the throw rug and dropped it out the window, i'm sorry
he bought me ice cream then took me home and fucked the shit outta me. you can't write this kinda romance.
Is it bad that I like to have a guy to flirt with in every class? I feel like it's excellent motivation: to shave, to shower and to show up.
I am watching Wayne Gretzky and Alexander oveckhin play video games for charity. What is life right now.
Randomize
