And then she said we stopped for a train and i tried crawling out the back window.. again, i dont remember this.
Drunk. Just jacked off for the third time in an hour. I love not being Catholic anymore.
Who would have thought google would have HELPED me fail a test...not pass...thank you pacman, thank you google....
I woke up on the stairs at of a Disneyland hotel. Yes, my night was amazing.
Court can wait. right now you and your magic penis need to be here satisfying me.
sometimes u just have to say fuck it and help a straight sixteen year old break into her uncles gay bar.
WTF YOU SHOULDNT BREAK A SWEAT TAKING A SHIT. MY BODY HATES ME.
I'm just saying; the box truck will cost less then dorms or rent, and we can always crash where the party is.
Also, thank you for letting me cry in your lap on the bathroom floor. I can't remember if I was clothed at that point, but if I wasn't, extra thank you.
You thought there were zombies attacking us so you tried to tuck and roll out of a moving vehicle. Also you should consider wearing underwear
Well, we ended up labeling the relationship. We are now each other's designated butt-toucher.
I thought you couldn't go near Germans after that restraining order
Fuck it, if you can't drink cheep beer and whiskey with me, I don't want you.
Any idea why my ass cheeks are bruised again?
The fact that theyre bruised AGAIN means you're not adult enough to know why.
I am still worried she'll have a seizure durring. What would I do? Try to ride it out and finish, or pull out and assist?
Randomize
