the chick doesn't look like she's put anything in her mouth for weeks other than his dick.
The dutch village is so much worse hungover. Fuck them and their wooden shoes.
Just tipped at a bar in cheerios. Suck it.
screw that ipod for my birthday.. i just want a weed brownie the size of my face. that's all.
I'm tempted to see how fat I can get before he leaves me. It's obvious we're playing a game of chicken here.
I'm concerned I'll look like a hooker on new years eve in this outfit
There are different standards on new years eve. To look like a hooker you literally need to be giving a guy head on the street while he's handing you cash.
Can I also remind you that we insisted on touching his mustache?
Well of course I remember it took up like 20 minutes of my night.
Buying a pregnancy test at Walmart in the middle of the night in the middle of Tennessee is not really how I imagined my 25th year on this planet starting out...
i would compare it to sliding down a velcro-covered fireman's pole naked. no more bearded men for me.
No it was fine, I've just never seen that many people eat dog food
last thing I remember is yelling 'sit on my face' through a traffic cone
Exactly best part of my night he took of his shirt and surprise traveler fanny pack
I think were only still together so we can make each other miserable
I love everything about him! His penis, his hair, his tattoos, his penis, his cat, his penis.
Also, what day were you thinkin we should trip balls at the children's museum?
Randomize
