Just met a synchronized swimmer, can you imagine the things she could do in the water
Legs for days
Harpoon that
guess who just got paired up at the beer pong table with the fat girl who's nipples are hanging out...
Yeah, I was googling pictures of sharks, and I accidentally typed "shart." Huge mistake.
I just found out my boyfriend is cheating on me, please tell me Carl is a unisex name.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My number one goal in life is to find out who can fill a keg with Popov
Do me a favor. Next time I think it's a good idea to take pulls from the handle, yell "FALCON PUNCH" and uppercut me in the taint. My future liver thanks you.
i had a mental breakdown over a math asignment proposed to a glass of chocolate milk then burned my hands when i acidentally leaned on the stove i have the grill marks burned on my hands i can see them
its only been 20 minuts since i last saw you
How long have I been using my debit card as a coaster?
Just jacked in the family restroom in the hospital while eating beef jerky and looking at reddit gone wild.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
this temple that is my body is starting to crumble and turn into ruins
Called my house today and my 10 year old brother answered and asked if I was still in jail
feeding cats lunchmeat on my kitchen floor. come pour me another shot.
I'll seduce him with my charm, after all, I am a graceful swan.
More like a demented cow.
I don't remember anything from last night, but at track I found my thong next to the high jump pit... So it must has been decent
Can I send you a random dick pic? It's got a lightsaber tattoo
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