How do you feel about the band name "O'labia Newton John"??
i hope kanye doesn't show up to patrick swayze's funeral. " i'll let you get back to your funeral in a minute...but michael jackson had the best death of the year. just sayinnn ".
I dinstinctly remember making out to "I believe I can fly" and waving my arms like a bird to the beat.
its 4am and she invited me over to split a 'romantic bowl of frosted flakes'...really dude?...what do you think she's trying to say?...she better not be kidding about the frosted flakes though.
If I ever mention marriage force me to Brazil to do coke and strippers until I die.
WHAT KIND OF DUMPSTER DOESNT HAVE PIZZA IN IT?
Heard puking from next door. Looks like the third floor won't be any different than the second.
I just watch that 70s show all day and blaze whenever they do. It's nice being part of the circle
So how was your new years? Did u ride a horse at 3am in zero degree weather? Because I sure did
I woke up with your vibrator in my face
we had a "who's sex playlist is better?" fight.....
Also so weird my phone cracked after I repeatedly threw it at the ground as hard as possible
So let me get this straight I was getting drunk with our science teacher from high school and you got drunk with an 82 year old woman who invited you back to her house and made you sandwiches.
Yes.
at what point last night did i get this tattoo of an anchor made of dicks?
around eleven
No I'm not high but I did cry for over an hour tonight because I realized that they never made a sequel to "Under the Tuscan Sun" with Diane Lane.
Randomize
