hot doctor. gonna get him to touch my tits. 'think i felt a lump' excuse in 3-2-1...
First funeral I've ever been to where the cops had to come.
I told him if I was pregnant we were coming out to the people at work, because I'm not pretending to get knocked up by an imaginary boyfriend.
I always hoped that one day I'd have a sex position named in my honor.
The only thing you accomplished yesterday was dry humping me on the floor of my work place WHILE I was working.
He woke me up at 3 am, turned me on, then changed his mind. There is no way he is getting out of twilight now.
I think I just smoked a piece of your foot. Were u picking your feet by the weed?
He made me twerk for scrambled eggs... I regret nothing
40s are totally the cure
I'm going through what feels like a break up with beer. I'm emotionally distraught from it's lack of presence.
HOW DID I LET MYSELF GET SUCKED IN HE HAS A PENIS FOR PETE'S SAKE.
In theory, it seemed like it would work.
Do not, I repeat, DO NOT uncuff him no matter how much he begs. He knows what he did.
I keep finding granola in my bed. This is what I get for sleeping with a guy from Oregon.
We have massive handle of kettle and a rack of hi life
That's the happiest ive ever been at 7:48 am....
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