Why. Ill be the rabbit if ull be the carrot.
Did you dl zombie porn on my computer?
i find it depressing how it takes me longer to find a good video compared to the actual jacking off process.
do people in england often walk their sheep on leashes? or is this guy the exception to the rule?
stephanie tanner's voice is so fucking annoying. no wonder she resorted to crystal meth.
I can't find the keys to get out of my front door, there are random socks in my bicycle basket and I can see a plastic handle of cheap vodka sitting on my porch. oh, and my head just broke u with me.
She danced with a broom while telling me I was "cool as shit" and she "wishes she could take a portion of my big ass and attach it to hers" then she passed out
The van in front of me contains people having SEX. I am in full view of a SEX VAN.
It looks like I promised him my virginity, in spanish. What the hell did you give me?
And to add, there was a fat guy right next to me who, when the girls would shake their butts, he would let out a shrill xena warrior princess cheer
U know this is gone far when im in the bathroom trying to take a pic of my asshole
I find him attractive in the absolute weirdest way. Like I need him to do my taxes, but I also feel like I should spill things on him to gain his attention and then lick it off to gain his affection.
Ps. I'm slapping the bag. It's an emergency.
woke up this morning and she was gone. but she left a box of donuts on the counter with a note saying "for all the 'o's you gave me last night"
I told my mom that I was just gonna go check the mail. It's been 19 hours, and I woke up in a hot tub covered in chocolate, with a text from her sayin "have fun sweetie"
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