This wouldn't happen so much if fat girls would just stop being so damn easy.
Vodka infused whipped cream. Shit just got real.
That's why she's the girl with her life together and you're the girl with the penis drawn on your car.
She just left after she spent the past 2.5 hours fuckin the shit out of me. I'll put that in the logbook as a cross country
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
THEY WONT LEYT ME IN AND I REALLY NEED SOME FRUIT
it was really awkward meeting your mom for the first time while i was still wearing the condom we were using.
they paper machayed me.
i told you ... never pass out drinking with preschool teachers.
I was tied up in bed before noon, the rest of the day can go to hell.
Just realized I probably only have one more wedding where I can say I fucked the bride.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He sat on me and said I owed him $10, when I asked why he just said "lap dance"
Are there any rules against fucking the hot TA?
Maybe for her....
Her problem, not mine
The girl I was Skype sexing just asked for a moment of silence for robin Williams.
I hope none of us try to run for public office one day
Hey kevin, it's Ashlee. I have been trying to get ahold of you. Your pledge gave me your number. I really wanted to apologize for shitting in your car I'll buy new upholstery or pay to have it shampooed if needed. I'm so embarrassed.
I think I may have fully transcended this spectrum of life. I can see beams of light man. Down to the photons
What
The only downside is I can't stop skipping
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