I've decided through careful research we can out drink any country folk.
Is it bad that I voted for Scott Brown because I want to fuck him?
Nah. I did too.
Dude you should see the looks were getting for ordering a pitcher of beer with breakfast.
Hey man sorry, can't talk. I'm already taking risks by ripping the bong on this conference call.
Rolling one last joint on my Psych textbook before trading it in. I might actually cry.
He gets a blow job; I get my oil changed free of charge. And that way I only see him every 2500 miles.
still in the ER. she tried to shotgun a bottle of corona
Going to rent a magician for when I eat shrooms. How has no one thought of this?
I know how I'm going to make my fortune.. designing an icepack made specifically for the vagina.
somehow this turned into a costume party you have to get here now with my banana suit or I'm wearing my birthday suit
Sorry about coming to the pool in only a thong. I thought you said it was closed. Not that you were teaching a group of kids how to swim.
If my dick was big enough to fuck the eye of a hurricane, I would.
Pretty sure I just scored Election Day sex based on the theory that if either of these fools win the world as we know it is over so we might as well get a few orgasms in...
Tell me that I didn't just get ash in my Russian and just mix it TF in bc who cares and life has no meaning.
I a very close black and white picture of my slightly erect penis and I blew it up put it in an art gallery for a show coming up and somebody bought it for 30 Grand!!!
Randomize
