How do I get over judging people who I would be exactly like if I had a boyfriend
Get a boyfriend
I love how all these freshman girls think that they can wear what they wore last summer... freshman 15 at its skankiest
this is like black Friday for my dealer. I'm literally standing in line.
The google font looked peculiar last night, but then up close I realized it was just dry vomit.
That sucks. I just talked to a telemarketer for 15 minutes about CSI: Miami and weed.
She insisted on fucking on the futon mattress on the floor, answered the phone call from her boyfriend who was on his way to pick her up, and then had the audacity to ask if I was clean
Hes flirting with her via the sauce packets at taco bell....... I have no words
please come over and have sex with me so we can talk about prom and kill 2 birds with one condom
btw, do you remember scaling that porch last night?
Standards? I'm sitting on his couch eating microwaved ramen wearing his wife's t-shirt. I don't remember what having standards even feels like.
I have no idea what that means but I'm googling things just so I can watch my thumbs move
"Do You Wanna Build a Snowman" came on while I was riding his dick. I had to take a moment.
I told my boss that I'm in a slutty stage of my life right now and the chef overheard and slipped me his number. I might get laid tonight
it was her dad's 50th birthday kegger. Within the first 5 minutes I got punched in the ear from an off-duty cop and smoked a joint the size of my vibrator.
oh yeah, and she got boxed-out by said cop. Then her dad turned around and high-fived him for it
Literally had sex in his grow room under a plant.. ganja queen .
Randomize
