Already tried, she's too smart for that. I need a Primos "Do your wife in the butt" lure/call to trick her into wanting it
I'll probably just lay on my couch bra-less sipping wine out of a straw so I don't have to lift my head.
Since when do you have sex with people you have feelings for?
Dude you don't understand. I genuinely felt his soul's penis in my soul's vagina.
Oh yes. Made out with a grandmother..... she had fake boobs and it was 330am. That makes it okay.
Mardi gras at its finest.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm glad I get the same reaction from you for cookies and for my naked body
Dude. Her vagina is a blender.
Please stop using me as a reference for bail bondsmen.
He told me we were going to a cabin. It's just logs and a tarp made into walls. This night can go either way at this point.
There is a special place in Hell for whichever one of you put Ben Gay on my dildo. It was a very uncomfortable April 1.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You were literally hanging out the window and dancing to the remix to Ignition when we drove you home
As I was puking, these 2 guys started peeing next to me chanting me on
Just remembered when I first started going down on him he goes "ok now I feel a little better about the broncos losing"
I feel like a sex bomb and I need to go explode on somebody
I'm drunk but I just ate 2 heads of broccoli so does that mean it evens out?
Yes absolutlely
My hook-up from last week somehow found me at the club, saw the girl I was trying to fuck, kissed me right in front of her, and walked off.
Randomize