do u usually make out with people before telling them your name???
why does hillary duff have a greatest hits album?
Is it sad i was sitting here thinkin how i would only fuck Rob Pattinson if he was glittery at said time.
somehow you got everyone naked by playing strip rock paper scissors.
They had miseltoe over the keg.... thats cheating
hows that letter of apology to the waitress at waffle house coming?
and then he put stevie wonder on to fuck to...and hummed along as I blew him
I'm at Home Depot to get supplies to fix the wall we cracked by fucking too hard against the bookshelf.
Im sorry for drunkenly throwing your phone into the ocean. At the time it seemed like a good way for you not to text him
My last two google searches are "shiny things" and "Ohio consent laws." you should visit more often.
Day 1 of "Death of a Liver" weekend complete. It came with flashbacks of horrible mistakes I made due to alcohol. I'm excited for how Sunday is going to turn out.
I also like to call Halloween "Mystery Fuck Day"
He got me a cake that said " Congratulations on the dick "
We could never date. He doesn't drink and he won't bring me tacos after sex. He's on that healthy life bullshit.
Better not shit yourself at the gym.
Randomize
