Jesus can read your poker face... He is not pleased
His facebook profile says he's interested in men, but i'm choosing to ignore that
I woke up with a picture of my dick as my background. still wondering if it was a good night or not.
I think his parents are learning english from the phrases I shout during sex.
i really care about you, respect you, another gay word, and another gay word... lets just drink
If you ever find a dick that big chop it off and bring it to me.
I dunno, but she kept buying me shots and asking me to go places with her. oh btw we're signed up to go bungee jumping Saturday
sleeping in bed with your booty calls married sister...you're the stuff heroes are made of.
Pants-less sunday? Also I'm high and independence day is making me cry
im coming over
Haha I'm surprised I didn't see you I was drunkenly buying $70 in merchandise including a vibrating cock ring at that cvs around that time
I am very happy to share that the hospital says the testicle pain is normal and that they are going to take care of it.
Turn on the Discovery Channel
Lets fuck to motorcycle gang fighting
we found him passed out on the baseball field with two 40oz and wearing a tophat.
Where did he get the tophat?
im half tempted just to scoot up to him and whisper "I'm not wearing underwear" but idk if thats a heartfelt apology
Omg my butt feels so much better. Those suppositories are magic. It feels like Jesus fingered me in my sleep.
Randomize
