I've come to the conclusion that as a grad student I would much rather prefer to get laid then get drunk
I think you know full well that a few years ago my stance was the polar opposite
Hello, balls-out mistake. It's been a while.
this kid just came up to me and asked me if i wanted to play truth or aids with him and his friends. i'm in
I was like, "um, that's my butthole."
i just got so high i needed a buddy system to the kitchen
Her name is Sherri and her sister's are Brandy and Champagne. Of course I want to meet her parents.
I wonder if i could put a dildo on my bike seat to encourage me to exercise.
We play this game where we catch up on what we missed over five years of not talking to eachother, then we have sex like nothing ever happened.
You just sat there for two solid hours staring at your monitor and every five minutes screamed "LEGOOOOOS"
We watched the first ever season of SNL and fucked for so long. He accidentally punched me in the face, but I mean, John Belushi was the background noise of our sex. I can deal with it.
The fact that you walked around talking like Barbie and still got laid amazes me.
She had never heard the term "grundle" before. Classiest girl I've met in months
National tequila day this year falls on a Monday. I've never been more disappointed in my life.
Can u pick me up? Lost my keys.
Sure. FYI- you "lost" them on the roof, trying to throw them over the house.
you poured beer in your mouth so you could be a beer pong cup for her to drink out of/make out with
Did it work?
Randomize
